JT's comments below originally ran as part of Place to Be Nation's "Seinfeld: The PTBN Series Rewatch" project.
Best Character
I am going with a big old tie here between Jerry and Kramer. Kramer nailed it with all the physical comedy as well as the big blow up at Pisano's. Plus his quick hitter on off lines were on point this episode. Jerry was also locked in with great lines left and right and his growing hubris thanks to Nikki had him flying high and then crashing hard. I thought it was some of his best actual character work in a while. Honorable mention to Big Stein, who did quite well in this rare extended showing.
Best Storyline
I will go with the calzone, assuming it includes Kramer's antics at Pisano's. The scene where he yells at the guy at the counter is one of my all time favorites, as is the way he pronounces "Cal-i-Sone".
Ethical Dilemma of the Week
If you were dating a certified smoke show like Nikki would you let her traverse over to the house of a known playboy that preys on tricking women into dates? Get your fucking head in the game, Jerome. Over $300? We established how much money you make already this season. Jesus, man. You deserved to get played by Gack.
Relationship Scale (Scale 1-10)
Jerry's look of self disgust when he whores out Nikki to settle the sore with Gack tells you everything you need to know about how in over his head he is with her. Relationship Grade: She's Outta Your League/10
What Worked:
Big Stein taking a bite out of George's calzone in the middle of a meeting; Todd Gack; Bold and Beautiful; Jerry's dig at Gack: "Sammy Davis, Jr."; Nikki, hache mache; George saying he doesn't give bills to the blind; Kramer digging through his change on Jerry's table; Jerry and Nikki getting out of the speeding ticket was amazing and his "Alright Nik, let's hit it" was great; Kramer cooking his clothes in Jerry's oven; Jerry's line about being able to buy a house in Peru for $300; Kramer admiring Todd Gack's name; Jerry never having had a job; Huckleberry pie; Newman sitting on the fork; Kramer lugging the change in his pocket and then mispronouncing calzone; "Lay three of 'em on me!"; Kramer and the Pisano's paisan arguing is an all time classic scene; The guy in the background at the counter cracking up at Kramer yelling in Italian; Kramer clocking Gack with the sack of change was a nice payoff
What Didn't Work
Todd Gak may be shrewd but he is a real grimy piece of shit
Key Character Debuts
- Todd Gack
Iconic Moments, Running Themes & Memorable Quotes
- "Eggplant. Yes. That's a hell of a thing. Okay let's get back to business. Okay here you go. Very good, very good. Excellent excellent calzone you got there Costanza. Okay a little jealous now. Okay let's go. Ok last week... You know that eggplant was very good. Everybody out. I got eggplant on my mind. Costanza get me couple of those calzones right now. Pronto. Move out. Big Stein wants an eggplant calzone. Must have one. Everybody out. Out." - Steinbrenner
- "Dustin Hoffman in Star Wars!?! Short Jewish guy against Darth Vader. I don't think so." - Jerry
- "I got a date with Nikki." - Jerry Oh yeah she's a beauty." - Kramer "She's also quite bold" - Jerry "Oh bold and beautiful" - Kramer
- "All right lost and found. But these got to be a time limit. We're not running a pawn shop here." - Big Stein
- "Oh of course. Todd Gack. You did you bet was in Star Wars? Sammy, Davis Jr." - Jerry
- "Yeah. I am like a drug dealer. I got the guy hooked. I am having lunch at his desk everyday this week. He doesn't make a move without me. It's very exciting." - George "With you two guys at the helm. The last piece of the puzzle is in place." - Jerry
- "Beautiful women. You know they could get away with murder. You never she any of them lift anything over three pounds. They get whatever they want whenever they want it. You can't stop them." - George "She's like a beautiful Godzilla." - Jerry "Without thousands of fleeing Japanese." - George
- "Because if he doesn't ask you out he doesn't get rejected. He has found a dating loophole." - Jerry
- "I thought tomorrow maybe we'd try a little corn beef." - George "Corn beef. I don't think so. It is a little fatty." - Steinbrenner "How about Chinese?" - George "Uhhhhh. No. Too many containers. Big mess, big mess. Too sloppy .I want to stick with the calzones from Pisano's. That's the ticket." - Steinbrenner "I just thought it would be nice. A little variety." - George "No, no, no. George let me tell you something. When I find something I like I stick with it. From 1973 to 1982 I ate the exact same lunch everyday. Turkey chili in a bowl made out of bread. Bread bowl George. First you eat the chili then you eat the bowl. There's nothing more satisfying than looking down after lunch and seeing nothing but a table." - Steinbrenner
- "And it's more convenient." - Kramer "For both of us." - Jerry "And I have a lot more control. I have one shirt going for 10 minutes at 325 degrees." - Kramer "What's wrong with your oven?" - Jerry "I am baking a pie!" - Kramer
- "Peru! I paid $300 bucks for these. I could have bought a house in Peru for $300 bucks!" - Jerry
- "That's a nice name. Todd Gack. Is that Dutch?" - Kramer
- "Kramer's cooking up some corduroy." - Jerry
- "I called in sick. I don't work in the rain." - Newman "You don't work in the rain? Your a mailman. 'Neither rain nor sleet nor snow ...' It's the first one!" - George "I was never that big on creeds." - Newman
Oddities & Fun Facts
- It can not be confirmed if Gack is of Dutch original, but here is some detail on the ancestry of the name.
Overall Grade (Scale 1-10)
I love this episode, I always have and it totally holds up. Jerry killed it throughout and the interplay between him and Kramer was locked in. I also like when we mix up the interactions on the show and having George and Newman tied together was fresh, as was the heavy dose of Big Stein. It was an episode that felt very different in many ways and it worked well. Kramer yelling in Italian gibberish is an all time scene, especially when he slams his foot on the table. Plus... Nikki was smoking hot... and Todd Gack! Final Grade: 9/10
Best Character
I am going with a big old tie here between Jerry and Kramer. Kramer nailed it with all the physical comedy as well as the big blow up at Pisano's. Plus his quick hitter on off lines were on point this episode. Jerry was also locked in with great lines left and right and his growing hubris thanks to Nikki had him flying high and then crashing hard. I thought it was some of his best actual character work in a while. Honorable mention to Big Stein, who did quite well in this rare extended showing.
Best Storyline
I will go with the calzone, assuming it includes Kramer's antics at Pisano's. The scene where he yells at the guy at the counter is one of my all time favorites, as is the way he pronounces "Cal-i-Sone".
Ethical Dilemma of the Week
If you were dating a certified smoke show like Nikki would you let her traverse over to the house of a known playboy that preys on tricking women into dates? Get your fucking head in the game, Jerome. Over $300? We established how much money you make already this season. Jesus, man. You deserved to get played by Gack.
Relationship Scale (Scale 1-10)
Jerry's look of self disgust when he whores out Nikki to settle the sore with Gack tells you everything you need to know about how in over his head he is with her. Relationship Grade: She's Outta Your League/10
What Worked:
Big Stein taking a bite out of George's calzone in the middle of a meeting; Todd Gack; Bold and Beautiful; Jerry's dig at Gack: "Sammy Davis, Jr."; Nikki, hache mache; George saying he doesn't give bills to the blind; Kramer digging through his change on Jerry's table; Jerry and Nikki getting out of the speeding ticket was amazing and his "Alright Nik, let's hit it" was great; Kramer cooking his clothes in Jerry's oven; Jerry's line about being able to buy a house in Peru for $300; Kramer admiring Todd Gack's name; Jerry never having had a job; Huckleberry pie; Newman sitting on the fork; Kramer lugging the change in his pocket and then mispronouncing calzone; "Lay three of 'em on me!"; Kramer and the Pisano's paisan arguing is an all time classic scene; The guy in the background at the counter cracking up at Kramer yelling in Italian; Kramer clocking Gack with the sack of change was a nice payoff
What Didn't Work
Todd Gak may be shrewd but he is a real grimy piece of shit
Key Character Debuts
- Todd Gack
Iconic Moments, Running Themes & Memorable Quotes
- "Eggplant. Yes. That's a hell of a thing. Okay let's get back to business. Okay here you go. Very good, very good. Excellent excellent calzone you got there Costanza. Okay a little jealous now. Okay let's go. Ok last week... You know that eggplant was very good. Everybody out. I got eggplant on my mind. Costanza get me couple of those calzones right now. Pronto. Move out. Big Stein wants an eggplant calzone. Must have one. Everybody out. Out." - Steinbrenner
- "Dustin Hoffman in Star Wars!?! Short Jewish guy against Darth Vader. I don't think so." - Jerry
- "I got a date with Nikki." - Jerry Oh yeah she's a beauty." - Kramer "She's also quite bold" - Jerry "Oh bold and beautiful" - Kramer
- "All right lost and found. But these got to be a time limit. We're not running a pawn shop here." - Big Stein
- "Oh of course. Todd Gack. You did you bet was in Star Wars? Sammy, Davis Jr." - Jerry
- "Yeah. I am like a drug dealer. I got the guy hooked. I am having lunch at his desk everyday this week. He doesn't make a move without me. It's very exciting." - George "With you two guys at the helm. The last piece of the puzzle is in place." - Jerry
- "Beautiful women. You know they could get away with murder. You never she any of them lift anything over three pounds. They get whatever they want whenever they want it. You can't stop them." - George "She's like a beautiful Godzilla." - Jerry "Without thousands of fleeing Japanese." - George
- "Because if he doesn't ask you out he doesn't get rejected. He has found a dating loophole." - Jerry
- "I thought tomorrow maybe we'd try a little corn beef." - George "Corn beef. I don't think so. It is a little fatty." - Steinbrenner "How about Chinese?" - George "Uhhhhh. No. Too many containers. Big mess, big mess. Too sloppy .I want to stick with the calzones from Pisano's. That's the ticket." - Steinbrenner "I just thought it would be nice. A little variety." - George "No, no, no. George let me tell you something. When I find something I like I stick with it. From 1973 to 1982 I ate the exact same lunch everyday. Turkey chili in a bowl made out of bread. Bread bowl George. First you eat the chili then you eat the bowl. There's nothing more satisfying than looking down after lunch and seeing nothing but a table." - Steinbrenner
- "And it's more convenient." - Kramer "For both of us." - Jerry "And I have a lot more control. I have one shirt going for 10 minutes at 325 degrees." - Kramer "What's wrong with your oven?" - Jerry "I am baking a pie!" - Kramer
- "Peru! I paid $300 bucks for these. I could have bought a house in Peru for $300 bucks!" - Jerry
- "That's a nice name. Todd Gack. Is that Dutch?" - Kramer
- "Kramer's cooking up some corduroy." - Jerry
- "I called in sick. I don't work in the rain." - Newman "You don't work in the rain? Your a mailman. 'Neither rain nor sleet nor snow ...' It's the first one!" - George "I was never that big on creeds." - Newman
Oddities & Fun Facts
- It can not be confirmed if Gack is of Dutch original, but here is some detail on the ancestry of the name.
Overall Grade (Scale 1-10)
I love this episode, I always have and it totally holds up. Jerry killed it throughout and the interplay between him and Kramer was locked in. I also like when we mix up the interactions on the show and having George and Newman tied together was fresh, as was the heavy dose of Big Stein. It was an episode that felt very different in many ways and it worked well. Kramer yelling in Italian gibberish is an all time scene, especially when he slams his foot on the table. Plus... Nikki was smoking hot... and Todd Gack! Final Grade: 9/10
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