Seinfeld: The Series Rewatch - "The Nose Job" (S3, E9)

JT's comments below originally ran as part of Place to Be Nation's "Seinfeld: The PTBN Series Rewatch" project.

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Best Character

Kramer takes the cake for me here. He started hot with the nose job line and just gained steam from there, right down to reclaiming his jacket and taking Audrey from George. I loved his speech to Jerry over the phone number, treating him like he was a lowly addict. He was great in every scene he was in, both with lines and delivery. The K-Man takes it!

Best Storyline

Easily the nose job fiasco as it dominated the majority of the episode, only yielding to Jerry's organ war. The jacket stuff was fun too, but was just more background noise to the main event. George, Elaine and Kramer were all fantastic dealing with the nose, as was Jerry's quiet, subtle reactions to the whole thing. It was perfect storytelling that George was so superficial that he sabotaged the relationship just before she got herself fixed up.

Ethical Dilemma of the Week

Should George have brought up the nose job suggestion to Audrey on his own? Probably not until they were further along into things, potentially engaged or married. It is a tough subject to broach. His best bet was relying on somebody to say something to get the discussion on the table, which is what happened here.

Relationship Scale (Scale 1-10)

George and Audrey are the main relationship show pony for this one and I really enjoyed them. Audrey seemed like quite the catch and clearly was well off, tossing out suggestions for a Hawaiian vacation for George. She really seemed into our not-so-loveable loser but the nose stood in the way of eternal happiness. Alas, George couldn't see past it and ended up turning out the lights on this party. Jerry and Isabel was fine fodder as well and definitely a relatable story. The script practicing scenes were pretty funny, but Isabel is clearly someone that could not be tolerated for the long term. Relationship Grade: George & Audrey 5/10; Jerry & Isabel Penis/Brain

What Worked

George having spinach in his teeth during a job interview; Kramer's scheme to get his jacket back and blurting out about the nose job was just top of the line Kramer; Jerry's Isabel addiction led to some funny moments, including Kramer helping him dispose the number and Jerry shaking him down after with Kramer flipping out on him; Jerry's "I'm Nelson" line and delivery during the script reading was funny; The Landlord was awesomely absurd, including his obsession about Albert and thrashing of Babs; Kramer recapturing the jacket and stealing Audrey was a great way to wrap things up; I love how layered and deep the jacket story kept getting, with this wide range of well known characters involved.

What Didn't Work

Audrey has no other friends to see the nose job reveal? Only her roommate's friends?; George passing out and being carried to the couch after the reveal was a bit much; The penis/brain scene was kind of dumb and unneeded.

Key Character Debuts

N/A

Iconic Moments, Running Themes & Memorable Quotes

- "I really like her...I know that. I know one other thing. I won't get past that nose..." - George
- Kramer is still hunting for the Jacket
- The first mention of the name Peter Van Nostrand
- "Aw, you're as pretty as any of them...you just need a nose job!" - Kramer
- "Peter Jennings had one." - George "Really?" - Audrey "Who knows...they all do!" - George
- Audrey is now Elaine's roommate, replacing Tina
- "It may not be hell, but you're gonna run into some bad dudes..." - Jerry
- "It's like my brain is facing my penis in a chess game!" - Jerry
- "It's like going to the bathroom in front of a lot of people, and not caring!" - George "It's not like that at all..." - Jerry
- "How you feeling?" - Elaine "Too much salt in my diet..." - George
- "Alright! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Look at what you've sunk to! Look at what you've become! Look in the mirror, cause you need help, Jerry. You need help, because I can't stand by and do it anymore. It's turning my stomach! I can't stand around here watching you destroy yourself. It's eating me up inside!" - Kramer
- "Tell me, is it your contention that Shakespeare was an imposter?"- Landlord "My contention?" - Kramer "Yes, your contention. - Landlord "Yes, that's my contention." - Kramer "I heard him contend that." - Elaine
- We find out Kramer's mother's name is Babs
- "Yes, they're crazy about him. There was one in particular, came around about two years ago, looked a lot like you, Professor. Could have been your mother. What was her name again? Carter? Kramer! That's it, Babs Kramer. Nasty woman, many a night I had to throw her out on the street, drunken stumblebum." - Landlord "You don't say?" - Kramer "I found it!"- Elaine "The woman used to walk around here half naked, sucking Colt 45 from a can. Her big fat stomach hanging out, orthopedic hose up to her knees, screaming down the hall, "Come back to bed, Albert, you big hairy ape, and bring back that box of Danish!" - Landlord

Oddities & Fun Facts

- Jerry and George are talking at a newsstand
- Quick hit cutaway flashbacks are used for the first time
- Kramer goes dancing at a reggae club
- Tawny Kitaen portrays Isabel
- Kramer is smoking inside the apartment building

Overall Grade (Scale 1-10)

This was a nice followup to The Tape and was very similar in that it was a rock solid outing filled with good one liners, bubbling chemistry and strong delivery. But, just like The Tape it was missing those classic, all time scenes to push it up to the top box here. It has been said before, but as we are seeing, to start nabbing the really high grades, these episodes are going to have to be of the legendary ilk. Otherwise, they all top out around the same spot: great for any sitcom, merely very, very good for Seinfeld. Final Grade: 6/10

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