Seinfeld: The Series Rewatch - "The Puffy Shirt" (S5, E3)

JT's comments below originally ran as part of Place to Be Nation's "Seinfeld: The PTBN Series Rewatch" project.

puffyshirt

Best Character

The Costanzas. All of them. They won and dominated every scene. They were so good that the amazingness of the Puffy Shirt was overmatched by them. The bickering, the nonsense, the guilt trips, all of it is gold. Put the damn bananas on the side!

Best Storyline

George's hand modeling career takes it for me. As great and as memorable as the Puffy Shirt was, everything to do with George's move home and brief moment of glory was so perfectly executed that is has to win here. Seeing him so happy for once before it all instantly blows up is what Costanza is all about. Him being forced to move home and being tortured at dinner before turning the tables and making his mother into a doting servant was brilliance. And Frank...well, Frank is Frank.

Ethical Dilemma of the Week

Should Jerry have been forced to wear the Puffy Shirt on the Today Show based on the misunderstanding? I think his relationship with Elaine supersedes Kramer's brief dalliance with the Low Talker. Jerry should have said no to the pirate wear and did what he set out to do, get awareness for Elaine's fundraiser. Learn how to speak up, Leslie!

Relationship Scale (Scale 1-10)

Leslie was annoying. Kramer can do better. He is so brash and outgoing, how can he date someone that he can't even hear? Or can he? Either way, she is a crappy designer and a crappy speaker. Relationship Grade: Jack Sparrow/10

What Worked

George moving back home is a great storyline to execute; Kramer offering both his and Jerry's apartments to George was a good laugh as was the scene where they move him into the house; The bologna sandwich argument is one of my all time favorites; The fucking Puffy Shirt, The fucking Low Talker; The Constanza Family dinner is amazing, from civil service tests to silver dollars to incompetent waiters, it had it all; George being discovered as a hand model is a randomly tremendous idea; Kramer's hand buzzer gag was good; Jerry's delayed reaction to Kramer mentioning him agreeing to wear the Puffy Shirt into the reveal is top notch; The manicure scene at the Constanza home is pure aces with George scolding his mother for holding the scissors the wrong way to the bananas and the Jell-O, so great; Elaine's reaction to the Puffy Shirt on Jerry is so good; Ray McKigney and the callback to the Contest is amazing; Bryant Gumbel's obsession with the Puffy Shirt driving Jerry to snap was well done; George's gallop through the park always makes me chuckle; Poor George's modeling career went right to shit so quickly; The bums with the Puffy Shirts is a great way to close the episode

What Didn't Work

The crazy overreaction of the model scout when George knocks her purse over is absurd.

Key Character Debuts

- Leslie, the Low Talker

Iconic Moments, Running Themes & Memorable Quotes

- "Listen carefully. My mother has never laughed. Ever. Not a giggle, not a chuckle, not a tee-hee... never went 'Ha!'" - George
- "No, no, no, no. Borrowing money from a friend is like having sex. It just completely changes the relationship." - George
- "I made some bologna sandwiches." - Estelle "Bologna?! No one eats bologna anymore!" - George "What are you talking about?! Have a sandwich." - Estelle "No thanks." - Jerry "Oh, stop it! You don't want one, Kramer?" - Estelle "Uhh.. no thanks." - Kramer "I think you're all a little touched in the head. (Puts the plate down) You're so worried about your health.. You're young men." - Estelle "I really don't eat it." - Jerry "What am I gonna do with all these sandwiches?! Will you take them home? Give them to someone in your building?" - Estelle "I don't know if I'd feel comfortable handing out bologna sandwiches in the building." - Jerry
- The terms "Puffy Shirt" and "Low Talker" immediately become pop culture catchphrases
- "Yeah, see, I think people want to look like pirates. You know, it's the right time for it.. to be all puffy, and devil-may-care..." - Kramer
- "Maybe you should take a civil service test." - Elaine "I'm not taking a civil service test." - George "Look at this, George. You ever seen a silver dollar?" - Frank "Yes, I've seen a silver dollar." - George "Why don't you want to take a civil service test?" - Estelle "To do what?! Work in a post office? Is that what you want me to do?" - George "Would you believe when I was 18, I had a silver dollar collection?" - Frank "I don't understand. You get job security - you get a pay check every week..." - Estelle "I'm a college graduate. You want me to be a mailman?" - George "You know, I couldn't bring myself to spend one of these. I got some kind of a-a-a-a-a phobia." - Frank "So what are you gonna do?!" - Estelle "I don't know. I do know that I have some kind of a talent - something to offer. I just don't know what it is yet!" - George "I bet that collection would be worth a lot of money today." - Frank
- "What, are you kidding? The knuckles are all out of proportion. you got hair over there - where do you get off comparing your hands to my hands?! This is a one-in-a-million hand." - George "Well, that's what comes from avoiding manual labor your whole life." - Jerry
- "Yes, yes. This pirate trend that she's come up with, Jerry, - this is gonna be the new look for the 90's. You're gonna be the first pirate!" - Kramer "But, I don't want to be a pirate!" - Jerry
- "I knew it. I knew it.. I always knew you always had beautiful hands. I used to tell people. Frank, didn't I use to talk about his hands?" - Estelle "Who the hell did'ya ever mention his hands to?" - Frank "I mentioned his hands to plenty of people!" - Estelle "You never mentioned them to me!" - Frank
- "Georgie, would you like some Jell-O?" - Estelle "Why'd you put the bananas in there?!" - Frank "George likes the bananas!" - Estelle "So let him have bananas on the side!" - Frank "Alright! Please, please! I cannot have this constant bickering!.. Stress is very damaging to the epidermis! Now, I have an important photo session in the morning - my hands have got to be in tip-top shape, so please - keep the television down, and the conversation to a minimum." - George "But Georgie.. what about the Jell-O?" - Elaine "I'll take it in my room." - George
- ""Why am I wearing is now?'? I'll tell you why I'm wearing it now - because the lowtalker asked me to, that's why! And I said 'yes'. Do you know why? Because I couldn't hear her!" - Jerry
- "You're all puffed up!.. You look like the Count of Monte Cristo!" - Elaine
- "l feel ridiculous in it. l think it's the stupidest shirt l've ever seen, to be perfectly honest with you." - Jerry
- "'Avast ye, matey''? What the hell does that mean? ''Twenty degrees off the starboard side. lt's a Spanish galleon.' There's no comeback for that." - Jerry

Oddities & Fun Facts

- The businessman at the photo shoot is portrayed by David Brisbin, who also portrayed Mr. Ernst in Nickelodeon's Hey Dude

Overall Grade (Scale 1-10)

This was pretty much the perfect Seinfeld episode. Zero wasted scenes, no down moments, everything tying together seamlessly. It had it all. Oh, and two iconic all time pop culture crossover bits in the Low Talker and the Puffy Shirt. Those terms immediately blew up in popularity. George was amazing here, as were Frank and Estelle, and their constant arguing was nonsensically great. Bologna sandwiches, silver dollars, sharp scissors, civil service tests, bananas, Jell-O and dickhead waiters. What more do you want? The Puffy Shirt jokes and reactions were perfect as was the payoff of Jerry melting down while wearing the shirt. Plus, the Contest callback was a nice touch and wasn't forced at all. Easy perfect score for me on this one. Iconic. Final Grade: 10/10

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