JT's comments below originally ran as part of Place to Be Nation's "Seinfeld: The PTBN Series Rewatch" project.
Best Character
I really liked George a lot in this one. Jerry was good too, with lots of top notch one liners. Elaine and Kramer? Strong as always. But...babe...step off. Tony is the only real choice this time around. Whether he is rocking his backwards cap, eating salmon sandwiches or reading Superman comics, he is the man we all wish to be. He is everything you want. He is everything you need. He is Tony. The mimbo's mimbo.
Best Storyline
The adventures of George and Tony take this one for me. Kramer's sex hotline addiction and Elaine's quest to find the stingy toilet paper hoarder were well executed, but the rock climbing scene is an all time classic. Also, George man crush on Tony was just really well done and not overacted at all.
Ethical Dilemma of the Week
Did George really have any right to blame Kramer for Tony's accident? No. George was in charge of the rope. He should have secured it all first before dipping into his pockets to show off his delicious sandwiches. Sure, Kramer glommed onto his man-date, but the K-Man did nothing wrong here, dude.
Relationship Scale (Scale 1-10)
Jane is whatever. Erika is whatever. Tony? Tony is where it is at. He and Elaine is never going to last, but he and George? There is a real dominatrix vibe in the air there. Within weeks, Tony would forgive George, but make him do some errands and clean his apartment. Then, Kramer comes by and as he and Tony head to the bowling alley for a night out, George is left behind to wash dishes and wonder what could have been on that mountain if things had just gone according to plan. Relationship Grade: Babe/Dude
What Worked:
Tony is immaculate immediately, babe; Jerry's trolling of Tony to Elaine always makes me chuckle, as does his reaction when Elaine first tells the stall story; Andre's sexcapade is top notch; George's infatuation with Tony is so enjoyable, especially when he swings his hat around at the diner; Kramer being cool enough to slip right in with Tony makes all the sense in the world; Kramer and George on the mountain is an iconic visual; Tony falling is a great swerve, because you expect it but not totally; Jerry shoveling the gum in Jane's mouth was great on the fly thinking; Jerry asking George if Tony liked the sandwiches after Elaine runs off always cracks me up; The massage callback was great; Kramer meeting Jane was amazing, really well done; The closing stretch with everything coming together was a hell of a finish, between Elaine's revenge and Jane's final whisper to Kramer, just great storytelling; Elaine's shit-eating grin when she storms out of the bathroom with the rolls of toilet paper was fantastic
What Didn't Work
I love Tony even if he is everything annoying about the adrenaline rush extreme sports junkies of the early 90s; Jane is really selfish across the board; How did Kramer and George contact help in this pre-cell phone era?
Key Character Debuts
Jane
Tony the Mimbo
Iconic Moments, Running Themes & Memorable Quotes
- "Three squares? you can't spare three squares??" - Elaine "No I don't have a square to spare, I can't spare a square" - Jane "Oh is it two-ply? cause it it's two-ply I'll take one ply, one ply, one, one puny little ply, I'll take one measly ply!" - Elaine "Look, I don't have a square and I don't have a ply!" - Jane
- "Elaine, you cannot judge a person on a situation like that. I mean it's like asking for someone's canteen in the desert!" - Jerry
- "Hey Andre, get the hell off the phone!" - Jerry
- "Elaine, he's a... he's a male bimbo, he's a mimbo" - Jerry "He's not a mimbo, he's an exciting, charismatic man and he just happened to have a perfect face..." - Elaine
- "Bowling! what do you see bowling? Bowling's insane! Bowling is crazy time!" - George "Bowling? I don't think so George you get no rush from bowling!" - Tony "Rush? you want a rush? drop a bowl on your toe my friend, talk about a rush, you'd be throbbing, you'd see visions!" - George
- "Cool, so what do you say we climb a rock manana?" - Tony "Huh.. maana? huh maana might...huh mnaana might be a problem, I'm supposed to have huh a boil lanced manana. Huh you know I think they charge me if I cancel with only one manana's notice," - George
- "Hey, hey Kramer my man, what are you doing mañana?" - Tony "Mañana, I'm doing nada." - Kramer "What do you say you scale some rock with me and George?" - Tony "Huh Tony? there's not gonna be too many sandwiches..." - George
- "Rock climbing? hehe.. where do you come off going rock climbing...rock climbing? you need a boost to climb into your bed!" - Elaine
- "You know I think you're in love with him..." - Kramer "What?.. that's ridiculous!" - George "No no no, I don't think so. You love him." - Kramer "You better be careful on those rocks tomorrow buddy. And you're not getting any sandwiches either!" - George
- "Well that voice, it's very familiar...throaty, almost flinty..." - Kramer
- "Yeah I got some sandwiches.. I got tuna.. and salmon salad Tony because I know you don't like peanut butter!" - George
- "Kramer was supposed to tie a knot..." - George "Whoa ginga, you were supposed to tie the knot..." - Kramer "Did something happen?" - Elaine "Tony.. took a bit of a tumble..." - George "His face, did something happen to his face?" - Jerry "ell it all depends on what you mean by...happen..." - Kramer
- "I just wanted to talk to Tony for a minute..." - George "Step off George, I don't wanna see you!" - Tony "Me? Step off?" - George "Yeah, Tony says you better step off George..." - Elaine "But..why, it wasn't my fault, I .. you asked me a sandwich, I .. I make such delicious sandwiches Elaine..." - George "Just beat it dude!" - Tony "Here here, Superman please, next time it will only be the two of us..." - George "There won't be any next time George!" - Tony "Oh Tony don't..." - George "Ok step off George, can you just step off?" - Elaine
- "Jerry, that voice is tattooed on my brain, I'm telling you it's her!" - Kramer "Oh you're crazy..." - Jerry "Am I? or am I so sane that you just blew your mind?" - Kramer "It's impossible..." - Jerry "Is it? or is it so possible your heard is spinning like a top?" - Kramer "It can't be!" - Jerry "Can't it? or is your entire world just crashing down all around you?" - Kramer
Oddities & Fun Facts
- Jane is portrayed by actress Jami Gertz
- Tony is portrayed by actor Dan Cortese
- Kramer wants to call a 976 number, which indicates a toll based phone sex line
- "I don't have a square to spare" becomes a pop culture catchphrase
Overall Grade (Scale 1-10)
I always remembered liking this episode, but I went in assuming it would be solid, but not overwhelmingly great. I was wrong. I laughed the whole way through. There was tons of great one liners and memorable moments, including "square to spare" catchphrase, and the big payoff at the end was brilliantly done, especially with Jane's double back to reveal she was indeed Erika. Plus, Kramer's whole spiel to Jerry when he pieces the puzzle together is one of my favorite K-Man rants. George's crush was tremendous too and I just adore Tony as well. Great episode with lots of praise to spare. Final Grade: 8/10
Best Character
I really liked George a lot in this one. Jerry was good too, with lots of top notch one liners. Elaine and Kramer? Strong as always. But...babe...step off. Tony is the only real choice this time around. Whether he is rocking his backwards cap, eating salmon sandwiches or reading Superman comics, he is the man we all wish to be. He is everything you want. He is everything you need. He is Tony. The mimbo's mimbo.
Best Storyline
The adventures of George and Tony take this one for me. Kramer's sex hotline addiction and Elaine's quest to find the stingy toilet paper hoarder were well executed, but the rock climbing scene is an all time classic. Also, George man crush on Tony was just really well done and not overacted at all.
Ethical Dilemma of the Week
Did George really have any right to blame Kramer for Tony's accident? No. George was in charge of the rope. He should have secured it all first before dipping into his pockets to show off his delicious sandwiches. Sure, Kramer glommed onto his man-date, but the K-Man did nothing wrong here, dude.
Relationship Scale (Scale 1-10)
Jane is whatever. Erika is whatever. Tony? Tony is where it is at. He and Elaine is never going to last, but he and George? There is a real dominatrix vibe in the air there. Within weeks, Tony would forgive George, but make him do some errands and clean his apartment. Then, Kramer comes by and as he and Tony head to the bowling alley for a night out, George is left behind to wash dishes and wonder what could have been on that mountain if things had just gone according to plan. Relationship Grade: Babe/Dude
What Worked:
Tony is immaculate immediately, babe; Jerry's trolling of Tony to Elaine always makes me chuckle, as does his reaction when Elaine first tells the stall story; Andre's sexcapade is top notch; George's infatuation with Tony is so enjoyable, especially when he swings his hat around at the diner; Kramer being cool enough to slip right in with Tony makes all the sense in the world; Kramer and George on the mountain is an iconic visual; Tony falling is a great swerve, because you expect it but not totally; Jerry shoveling the gum in Jane's mouth was great on the fly thinking; Jerry asking George if Tony liked the sandwiches after Elaine runs off always cracks me up; The massage callback was great; Kramer meeting Jane was amazing, really well done; The closing stretch with everything coming together was a hell of a finish, between Elaine's revenge and Jane's final whisper to Kramer, just great storytelling; Elaine's shit-eating grin when she storms out of the bathroom with the rolls of toilet paper was fantastic
What Didn't Work
I love Tony even if he is everything annoying about the adrenaline rush extreme sports junkies of the early 90s; Jane is really selfish across the board; How did Kramer and George contact help in this pre-cell phone era?
Key Character Debuts
Jane
Tony the Mimbo
Iconic Moments, Running Themes & Memorable Quotes
- "Three squares? you can't spare three squares??" - Elaine "No I don't have a square to spare, I can't spare a square" - Jane "Oh is it two-ply? cause it it's two-ply I'll take one ply, one ply, one, one puny little ply, I'll take one measly ply!" - Elaine "Look, I don't have a square and I don't have a ply!" - Jane
- "Elaine, you cannot judge a person on a situation like that. I mean it's like asking for someone's canteen in the desert!" - Jerry
- "Hey Andre, get the hell off the phone!" - Jerry
- "Elaine, he's a... he's a male bimbo, he's a mimbo" - Jerry "He's not a mimbo, he's an exciting, charismatic man and he just happened to have a perfect face..." - Elaine
- "Bowling! what do you see bowling? Bowling's insane! Bowling is crazy time!" - George "Bowling? I don't think so George you get no rush from bowling!" - Tony "Rush? you want a rush? drop a bowl on your toe my friend, talk about a rush, you'd be throbbing, you'd see visions!" - George
- "Cool, so what do you say we climb a rock manana?" - Tony "Huh.. maana? huh maana might...huh mnaana might be a problem, I'm supposed to have huh a boil lanced manana. Huh you know I think they charge me if I cancel with only one manana's notice," - George
- "Hey, hey Kramer my man, what are you doing mañana?" - Tony "Mañana, I'm doing nada." - Kramer "What do you say you scale some rock with me and George?" - Tony "Huh Tony? there's not gonna be too many sandwiches..." - George
- "Rock climbing? hehe.. where do you come off going rock climbing...rock climbing? you need a boost to climb into your bed!" - Elaine
- "You know I think you're in love with him..." - Kramer "What?.. that's ridiculous!" - George "No no no, I don't think so. You love him." - Kramer "You better be careful on those rocks tomorrow buddy. And you're not getting any sandwiches either!" - George
- "Well that voice, it's very familiar...throaty, almost flinty..." - Kramer
- "Yeah I got some sandwiches.. I got tuna.. and salmon salad Tony because I know you don't like peanut butter!" - George
- "Kramer was supposed to tie a knot..." - George "Whoa ginga, you were supposed to tie the knot..." - Kramer "Did something happen?" - Elaine "Tony.. took a bit of a tumble..." - George "His face, did something happen to his face?" - Jerry "ell it all depends on what you mean by...happen..." - Kramer
- "I just wanted to talk to Tony for a minute..." - George "Step off George, I don't wanna see you!" - Tony "Me? Step off?" - George "Yeah, Tony says you better step off George..." - Elaine "But..why, it wasn't my fault, I .. you asked me a sandwich, I .. I make such delicious sandwiches Elaine..." - George "Just beat it dude!" - Tony "Here here, Superman please, next time it will only be the two of us..." - George "There won't be any next time George!" - Tony "Oh Tony don't..." - George "Ok step off George, can you just step off?" - Elaine
- "Jerry, that voice is tattooed on my brain, I'm telling you it's her!" - Kramer "Oh you're crazy..." - Jerry "Am I? or am I so sane that you just blew your mind?" - Kramer "It's impossible..." - Jerry "Is it? or is it so possible your heard is spinning like a top?" - Kramer "It can't be!" - Jerry "Can't it? or is your entire world just crashing down all around you?" - Kramer
Oddities & Fun Facts
- Jane is portrayed by actress Jami Gertz
- Tony is portrayed by actor Dan Cortese
- Kramer wants to call a 976 number, which indicates a toll based phone sex line
- "I don't have a square to spare" becomes a pop culture catchphrase
Overall Grade (Scale 1-10)
I always remembered liking this episode, but I went in assuming it would be solid, but not overwhelmingly great. I was wrong. I laughed the whole way through. There was tons of great one liners and memorable moments, including "square to spare" catchphrase, and the big payoff at the end was brilliantly done, especially with Jane's double back to reveal she was indeed Erika. Plus, Kramer's whole spiel to Jerry when he pieces the puzzle together is one of my favorite K-Man rants. George's crush was tremendous too and I just adore Tony as well. Great episode with lots of praise to spare. Final Grade: 8/10
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